Alright here's a stupid song I wrote today
Alright, ok this is called uh...
Would this be a world premiere?
Yeah this is probably the first and last time you'll hear this one...
Ok this is uh...this is whiskey bottle - no this is called uh
Whiskey-faced radioactive blowdryin' lady or something
Take out your whiskey bottle there
Now you don't even move out of your chair
Your getting juiced up beyond belief
I can barely love you when your getting drunk all the time
You can get out a blowdryer and
Blowdry the hair right off of your head
You can sautee my dollar bills and feed 'em to the dog
While he's watchin' cable
If I catch fire by mistake, she'll put out my face with a rake
And I shut my mouth before I even breathe
Well I can barely touch you honey, 'cause you're gettin' drunk all the time
Gotten radioactive tastebuds smeared across the rug
Swallow the keys to the chevy
You're gonna weedwack your way to memphis, yeah
Everybody knows about your style, you got tin-foil wrapped around your smile
Well you're gonna give me a xerox of your buckteeth...
Gettin...crap-faced all the time