"The Reaper Rap" lyrics - STEVE VAI

[Bill:] I'm Bill S. Preston, Esq.! And this is Ted "Theodore" Logan!
[B&T:] And we are Wyld Stallyns!
[DeNomolos:] I am DeNomolos. Now... what is your mission?
[Evil Bill:] First we totally kill Bill and Ted!
[Evil Ted:] Yeah, then we take over their lives.
[Evil Bill:] He's totally a robot!
[Evil Ted:] So are you, dude!
[Evil Bill:] Whoa, we're total metalheads!
[DeNomolos:] Destroy that ridiculous, insipid band!
[Evil B&T:] Death to Bill and Ted!
[Reaper:] Get down with your bad self!
[DeNomolos:] You fools! Are we ready?
[Reaper:] Get down with your bad self!
[DeNomolos:] You fools!
[Evil B&T:] Yeah, totally!
[Reaper:] Get down with your bad self!
[DeNomolos:] You fools! Are we ready?
[Evil Ted:] I've got a full on robot chubby.

[Evil B&T:] How's it goin', Bill and Ted?
[Bill:] Ted... it's us again!
[Ted:] Whoa!
[Bill:] You're metal, dude!
[Evil Bill:] I know! Check it out! We're totally gonna kill you now!
[B&T:] Whoa...
[Evil Bill:] Ha ha ha!
[Ted:] Dudes, even though you're doing this, we... we...
[Bill:] We love you!
[Evil B&T:] Fags!
[Bill:] You dick, Bill!
[Evil Bill:] I know! Let's waste 'em.
[B&T:] Aaaahhhhh!!!
[Reaper:] Get down with your bad self!
[Rufus:] Bogus
[Evil Bill:] Stellar, Evil Ted!
[B&T:] No way!
[Reaper:] Get down with your bad self!
[Rufus:] Bogus
[Bill:] Yeah!
[Reaper:] Get down with your bad self!
[Rufus:] Bogus
[Evil Bill:] Stellar, Evil Ted!
[B&T:] No way!
[Evil Bill:] I totally loogied on that good, dead me!

[Ted:] Bill, what happened?
[Bill:] Ted, we're dead, dude!
[B&T:] Whoa!
[Ted:] Who are you?
[Bill:] Ted, it's the Grim Reaper, dude!
[Ted:] Oh. How's it hangin', Death? We've got to get back to the babes!
[Bill:] Ted, we can't... we're dead, dude!
[Ted:] We've got to stop those evil us's! We've gotta try!
[Bill:] But how?
[B&T:] Melvin!
[Reaper:] They melvined me!

[Ted:] Dude, I totally broke a rock!*
[Bill:] Excellent!*
[Ted:] I kinda like this*... Who's that?
[Bill:] Ted, who do you think it is?
[Ted:] How's it goin', Beelzebub? Excellent rocks!*
[Bill:] We totally broke some.*
[Ted:] Okay, can we go now?
[B&T:] Whoa!
[Bill:] Thanks dude! You know, you've got a bad rap.
[Colonel Oates:] Gentlemen! Welcome to Hell!
[Ted:] Dude.
[Bill:] What?
[Ted:] I think we're in our own personal hell!
[Easter bunny:] You stole Deacon's Easter basket!
[Little Ted:] No way!
[Granny S. Preston, Esq:] How about a kiss?
[Little Bill:] Bogus!
[Bill:] You ugly red source of all evil!
[Granny S. Preston, Esq:] All I want is one! Right on the lips!
[Colonel Oates:] Get back here!
[B&T:] AHHHHHH!!!!!! WHOAAAAA!!!!!!!
[Bill:] That was non-non-non-non heinous!

[Evil Bill:] You suck, dude!*
[Bill:] Do something else, dude!*
[Ted:] Yeah!*
[Bill:] Not bad, dude!
[B&T:] Excellent!

[Reaper:] Get down with your bad self!
[Bill inside Sergeant:] Whoa, donuts!
[Ted inside Captain Logan:] I totally possessed my dad!
[Reaper:] Get down with your bad self!
[Ted inside Captain Logan:] Excellent!
[Bill inside Sergeant:] I totally believe you, dude!
[Reaper:] Get down with your bad self!
[Bill inside Sergeant:] Whoa, donuts!
[Ted inside Captain Logan:] I totally possessed my dad!
[Bill:] You totally killed us, you evil metal dickweed!
[Evil Bill:] That's right, lesser developed human prototype us's!*
[Bill:] Let's get 'em, Ted!
[Ted:] Ahhhhh, yeah, no!
[Colonel Oates:] Get 'em Granny!
[B&T:] We've got to face them.
[Colonel Oates:] Now get going!
[Various moans and groans of fears being defeated.]

[Bill:] Kiss your fears, dudes!
[Ted:] Or offer 'em a honeybun or something. And they'll get smaller and maybe they'll even go away!*
[Bill:] Yeah, they're not that bad, dude. So don't get programmed by anybody but yourself!*
[B&T:] Let's rock!
[Rufus:] And most important, do not do your homework without wearing headphones!
[Evil B&T:] Catch you later, Bill & Ted!
[Colonel Oates crying.]