"Pay The Alligator" lyrics - THE FLATLANDERS

Sheriff pulled me over and he started his jive
In a 20 mile zone I was doin 25
Son keep your lead foot off the accelerator
If you don't slow down you'll have to Pay the Alligator

I was countin my money in the back of my store
IRS came a knockin at my door
He found me hidin down behind my own refrigerator
If you don't pay me you gotta Pay the Alligator(whining - Not again!)

Pay the Alligator (Pay the Alligator)
Pay the Alligator (Pay the Alligator)
Might be sooner Might be later
One thing for sure you gotta Pay the Alligator

The afterlife come and it scared me half to death
I heard Saint Peter mutter underneath his breath
Take this bucket well talk about it later
You can paint the pearly gate or Pay the Alligator

Devil caught me lookin at the thermostat
I told him Id never touch nothin like that
He said shut the hell up and do what I say
Or you gonna have the alligator to pay

Order in the Court! Suspect on the Stand!
He said he saw the witness with a whistle in his hand
The Judge said I hate to implicate the perpetrator
But if you jack with the Judge, you gotta pay the Alligator

Walk on razors and sleep on on nails
Talk like ducks and walk like quails
Go blindfolded backwards through the Disconbobulater
If you don't do it right you gotta Pay the Alligator