Desperate Dan was a solitary man, a loner
He had a girl but I guess he'd just outgrown her
It's hard to dig but he made his big decision
Became the man who ate his car - Collision!!
They spread the news to every local station
Come see the guy who swallows cars, - Sensation!!
They said he couldn't digest it, but he just went ahead
And undressed it
Mechanic in a panic, oh what a state.
He ate his meal full of steel from a plate.
Munched his way into a million hearts as he ate the tyres
And the spare parts.
Some guys do anything to be seen, on the screen,
What a dream, its obscene.
Now it's clear that his career took a wrong turn,
The Golden Gate on a dinner date,
Heartburn, heartburn, heartburn
He's left the earth in a multi-berth Apollo
Venus and Mars, the rest of the stars to swallow.