"Drive-Thru" lyrics - TENACIOUS D

[Spoken:]
[JB:] Kage.
[KG:] Yeah?
[JB:] Let's go to the drive-through.
[KG:] Oh good, I'm starvin'.

[Vroom noise]

[EMPLOYEE (KG):] May I help you?
[JB:] Yeah, um, uh.
[EMP:] Can I have your order?
[JB:] Yeah, hold on a second I'm looking at the menu.
[EMP:] Ok.
[JB:]...ummm.
[EMP:] Would you like seasoned curly fries?
[JB:] Please, don't, don't offer me anything. I'll tell YOU want I want.
[EMP:] Ok.
[JB:] Um... ok... you know how you've got the six piece nuggets?
[EMP:] Yes, six piece chicken nuggets.
[JB:] Just, uh, can you just give me four nuggets? I'm trying to-
[EMP:] It comes in six or twelve piece. Would you like to try them?
[JB:] Shut up and listen to my order. Take the six nuggets, and throw two of them away I'm just wanting a four nugget thing. I'm trying to watch my calory intake
[EMP:] It comes in six or twelve piece.
[JB:] Put two of them up your ass, and give me four chicken mcnuggets.
[EMP:] All right, four six piece nuggets.
[JB:] And then um... can I have a Junior Western Bacon Chee. A JUNIOR Western Bacon Chee, I'm tryin' to watch my figure.
[EMP:] Western Bacon Cheeseburger.
[JB:] A JUNIOR Western Bacon Chee
[EMP:] Would you like that with onions?
[JB:]...No onions... um...
[EMP:] Ok Junior Bacon Cheeseburger, twelve piece chicken nuggets.
[JB:] And um... I'm gonna' go with a filet of fish sandwich, since that has less calories 'cause it has less calories because it's fish.
[EMP:] Filet o' Fish.
[JB:] Now if you could take a Coca-Cola and just go half Coca-Cola, half Diet-Coke cause' I'm trying to watch my figure. Tryin' to lose some of the weight.
[EMP:] Uh... you want half Coca-Cola half Diet-Coke?
[JB:] Um... and a SMALL, a SMALL chocolate shake. Because I'm trying to watch my figure. not a large, a small.
[EMP:] It comes in medium-small or medium-large. Small chocolate shake.
[JB:] Um also a small seasoned curlys. Small seasoned curlys.
[EMP:] OK I got small season's curleys, western bacon cheeseburger.
[JB:] Ummm... fuck my ass what else. Give me uh... all right cherrys jubilee and that's it.
[EMP:] $10.01.
[JB:] Wait. Kage what do you want?
[KG:] Uh. Geez... let me have uh... I think I want the regular western bacon cheeseburger, large shake, seasoned curlys.
[JB:] Oh GOD. Come on with the order. Take forever!
[KG:] That's all I want, that's all I want.
[JB:] GOOD. Ok. How much is that sir?
[EMP:] That will be $14.75 at the window please, please drive up.
[JB:] (To KG) Do you have any money?
[KG:] Oh shoot... umm yeah I got like. Uh...
[JB:] Give it to me... All right Here... Ok... we only have, umm... all right I'm gonna need to cancel the last two things on the order. Ok thank you. let's go.

[Vroom noise]